wang ou zi

 

        —— When I was leaning on a steel tube in the shaky body of a subway, there came in a street actress playing melodica, the song is "La vie en rose." ,with the rumble of the train, sexy.

 

        ——Once, when I got out off a party with drunk Cici, she wanna smoke. I accompanied her within in a smoky air beside the window of a Mcdonald's. We simply started talking to the blacks inside the store by body expression. The climax is that we blew on the window and wiped away the moisture with fingers to write down the words and draw the little symbols.

 

         That's New York City. As the movie "New York, I love you" says: why i love new york is that u just stand on the sidewalk of a corner. have a cigarette, thinking about ur life, meeting someone strange and have a short talk. And another word goes: why I love New York? cuz everyone all comes from everywhere.

 

         I had been searching for the movie for a long time, i got couples of torrents, but none worked. The thing is I happened to find a website about a theatre showing all kinds of non-mainstream movies. Then I found it was the last day of "New York, I love you"being on.  It was just the perfect time.

 

         I booked the ticket, one, of the Landmark theatre located on the lower east side. I picked up a very central position. As soon as the "curtain rised up", a strong belief rush into my head-all righty, yup, i m just right away heading into the screen, I feel like my life is in the movie and movie is my real life. It is completely, exactly where i should be.

 

         Before i sit in the center of the theatre, i had been invited to a program of Introduction to Fashion Retail. The professor is an expericed nice old gentleman, who was working in Bloomingdale and the other famous stores. However, as I rocked up my leg sitting on the lecture, wearing my boylish oxford, in front of my face, full of dead rational diagram, statistic, analysis, I made up my mind without hesitation, Yes, I quit. i totally quit of what a hell of fashion buyer, Merchandiser stuff. I m not gonna do these anymore. Noop, business is none of my business anyway.

 

         Thank mine, fashion is not idealism.

 

           这是外话了。

 

 

          当然，电影也是个外话，只是把美的东西拍的更美，或者不美的东西变美，更是丑陋的东西更丑，在这里，纽约没有多美，因为它关注的不是这个城市的面目，而是这个城市的人。但事实上，它是一个萧瑟，破败，冷漠的城市，小猫咪一样大的老鼠招摇过市，第五大道上不闯红灯的是白痴，手机信号永远淹没在地下铁的臭积水里…… 它是一个仅仅曼哈顿辉煌8条大道的地方，是一个走出哥大往北走几个街区就有冒着被黑人强奸威胁的地方，是一个永远堵车而又找不到停车位的地方，是一个……但是，人人都爱她，我爱在Time warner building的大玻璃外看夕阳西下的中央公园，我爱骑着自行车在纽大soho区寻找居酒屋里的乌龙酒，我爱在绵延几里的百老汇街遇见还没来得及卸妆的主演，我爱转角迷人微笑的金发小子和细腿吐烟的女郎，我爱每天路过新YanKees灯火通明的球场，我爱Moma里的为Frida和Dali……她洋溢着很暧昧的小布尔乔亚气氛，资本主义并上伍迪艾伦文化圈，下西区的知识分子们，也许是伪装的，都是挂着RayBan的狼。更有趣的是，并排坐着的三个人，每个人手里都拿着一份不同语言的报纸。犹太人，中东人，黑人，拉丁人，墨西哥人，意大利后裔……各聚集一个区，各自给自足。她是一个符号满溢的城市，被包装的城市，被打上双引号里面写两遍NY的城市，我不知道我爱她什麽，那最玄乎的东西就是那是一种feel，乐呵融融的feel。

 

 

 

 

          

 

  

 

 

         

 

 

 

2004.12.26-2009.11.16

 

我五年的精神世界啊

 

喔，写完了。

 

 

 

 

 

这仨黑匣子，再买三个，再买三个，放满自己拍的拙照，挂满墙壁。

 

 

 

 

           就让它像一场盛宴吧，生命。我知道我的顏色太浓重！

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

                   我再也不怕時間的流逝，我曾憎惡的被白白流失的一秒一時。

                  

                   而今我空空蕩蕩任它流枯，因與你一起，它早已凝固。

 

                   它是無。

 

                   我的確是不怕的，那些創傷足以麻木不可知的痛苦。

 

                   況且我從不想到過往和將。

 

                   因為沒有時間的介質。

 

 

 

 

                        ————————————昏昏沉沉，于昨日令人窒息的N20上

 

 

 

 

          ——我回到那个嘈杂的车站，此时却觉得万分安静，什麽喧嚣都没有了，因为我的心跟你一起睡了。风拂过的我的脸，是你20楼住处的风正拂过你的脸。